“When you hear hoof beats in Missouri, you aren’t thinking Zebra.”

I suppose it’s only proper to introduce my teachers, as they are the inspiration for such a blog. They are who I spend week in and week out listening to all day long. What have I learned from them? More than I ever thought I wanted to know. Because we spend almost every day with each of our professors, we learn a thing or two about them. We pick up the inflection in their voice, the words that they repeat in their lectures over and over again, their pet peeves about Physical Therapy, and, sometimes, a little too much about their personal life. (Don’t think in any way that this is me complaining about their teaching in any way. It is only a celebration of how ridiculous they are day in and day out) Which leads me to the introduction of the first professor.

He is the inspiration for this blog. Every class he says something that is perhaps borderline inappropriate or hilarious… or maybe it just doesn’t make sense at all. Michael Cibulka. Apparently in Latin, his last name means “little onion”. Onion is perhaps the correct way to describe such a man, as every day he peels back layer by layer by sharing his PT experience and quite a bit about life itself.

Profile: Michael Cibulka

Classes: Orthopedics; Specialization: Sacroiliac Joint

Most memorable quote: well… here we go. This is where the fun begins. You see, Mike doesn’t just say one memorable thing over and over again. He is full of surprises. I have termed what Mike says in a special category. They are called “Cibulkisms” Therefore, I’ll start with his repeats.

Cibulkisms:

The repeats:

“Poop or get off the pot!”

“KISS: keep it simple, stupid”

“If you hear hoof beats in Missouri, you aren’t thinking Zebra.”

“When I had gout…”

“Chicken or the egg”

“I don’t have x-ray eyes”

Words of wisdom (non repeats, but still good):

“Just follow the cortex and the fracture will find you.”

- in reference to imaging

“Porous is porous”

“Probably too much information about me going through menopause—well I’m not going through menopause.” (quote taken from what I call “the day mike shared too much”)

“Pat’s got nice legs”

“Remember, look for the horses, not the zebras.”

“They’re going to try to buffalo you! You got duped! Pulling the wool over your eye!” (mind you, not both eyes. People only try to pull wool over one eye, apparently)

- in reference to people faking injuries

Memorable moment/story: The day Mike came in with a black eye from being hit with a sledgehammer in the eye (??) after helping a friend build a deck.

Secret weapon: The sharing of too much information. Whether it be about PT practice or his own personal life, Mike has a knack for sharing WAY too much.

3/22/2010

A recap for last week:

Monday: Exercise Principles class on women’s health (guest lecturer: Jackie)

What I learned: proper pooping technique (ppp)- ask for further information

Quote of the day: “Ssshhh!” “Don’t tell me to be quiet!” “I’m not!” (will need further explanation if you aren’t in my class)

Tuesday: Cardiopulmonary test, emphasis on Pulmonary

Thursday: Functional Development test (pregnancy… shudder- newfound respect for mothers)

Highlights for the week(outside of Maryville University):

Anyone know an insurance company that wants to cover any of Obama's family right now?

Healthcare reform 2010 has passed. Obama’s lucky he doesn’t have to worry about insurance companies covering HIM as President, otherwise, he’d be out of luck.

Here is some insight that I found particularly amusing about it all:

"We here in Congress are giving a new meaning to March madness," Sen. Lisa Murkowski, R-Alaska, an opponent of the legislation, said Tuesday.

Well, that's all for this week. Enjoy.